Why I should Rule the World.

I have decided I should rule the world. If I were in charge, everyone would get paid what they're worth, or not worth, in some cases. Don't you hate those people who do way less than you at the same job, but get paid the same, or even more than you and you have to bust your butt to do what you do? That would not happen in my world. If you do less work than me, you will get paid less. That is how it will work. And if you don't work, you will only be paid if you have a pretty damn good reason for not having a job. Welfare would change if I were in charge of the world.

The opening ceremonies of the olympics would change if I ruled the world. There would be no spandex, no interpretive dancing, and far fewer of those plays where everything is a symbol of something else. If you want to say somethig, just say it. Don't pansy around it by putting on a play. And lets face it, the spandex really does have to go. It frightens small children, and most adults. Spandex were not meant to be worn. I still have no idea why they were invented. So if I ruled the world, I would outlaw spandex.

I would also be far better at ice climbing if I ruled the world. And rock climbing. And all those girls I hated in high school would be fat now. But I think that's everyone's fantasy. Admit it, you've thought about it. And I could eat everything I want and not gain weight as long as I ran every day. This would include pie, chocolate, and all manner of cakes and cookies. And there would always be money for vacations and trips.

Yes, I believe the world would be a better place if I put myself in charge.